Only 30 minutes a Day

Well, it has begun. Thursday I had to unbutton my pants at work. Sitting there with a waistband biting into my abdomen was amazingly uncomfortable, and well, they’ve been a little slow getting my maternity ACUs to me. Luckily, I got my two issued sets yesterday morning, so by lunch I was able to change into the kangaroo-pouch, elasticized, digital-camoflauge mommy pants. Elastic feels a lot better around the waistline than an un-stretchable buttoned waistband. Who knew.

So, the bowels are still moving excruciatingly slow, but at least they are, in fact, moving. I’m still needing to pee every five minutes, so as soon as I get to work, I throw my stuff onto my desk and race to the latrine (yeah, that’s military for bathroom). Yesterday morning, though, I spent 30 minutes in there as a BM (we’ll keep it clean and just call it that) turtled it’s way through the pitiful excuse I call bowels these days. Everyone assumed I was in there vomiting, so when I got out, I got a flood of, “You should eat crackers on your way to work so you won’t get sick,” and “if you switch your prenatal vitamin to taking it at night, that’ll fix your nausea.” I figured I’d let ’em think they were right. I didn’t have the heart to tell them that I was in there trying to push out a turd that wanted to stay in! I’m at 10 weeks today, and I still can’t complain about nausea, so woo-hoo!


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